26th
How A Movie Happens
Every movie starts off as a snowflake of an idea. You gather other snow around it and try to pack a nice big, hard, snowball, of a script. The rolling starts. You have to get the ball rolling to pick up more snow, more weight, more mass, and eventually more people to help push and roll the ball. You can paint a painting by yourself, but if you want to make a movie, a real movie, the kind of movie people want to watch, you need the help of other people. More people come on board to help push the ball, and it gets bigger. Established production companies send out crews of people to help you push, and as it gets bigger, bigger production companies send out more powerful groups of people to help push. At this point, you have a pretty big fucking ball of snow, a finished movie, but the pushing doesn’t stop. You have to keep pushing this giant ball because you have to get it so big that everyone who sees it is interested, and comes to take a look, buys a ticket to see the movie. This is when the judging starts. Critics come up and inspect the ball. Is it round? Is it full of dog shit? What is that yellow snow there? Depending on their verdicts you may see your ball slowly stop rolling, people giving up on pushing, the end of your journey, or you may find many other people rushing over to help push the ball, to get it rolling even faster, growing it bigger, there are critics helping now, audience members, and the oh my god, the fucking big studio publicity team, and everyone is on steroids! They are pushing your giant fucking ball of snow and entertainment over towards that ski slope! This thing is going to be huge! This could start an avalanche! What the fuck happened?! Someone smelled your giant ball of snow, and you know what it smelled like? Oscar buzz.
That’s how movies happen.
You know what I smell already in the PsychoPath snowball?
